“The Man I Love,” director Ira Sachs’ poetic and tender gay drama about love, desire, death and art, set in New York in the late 1980s, received an enthusiastic response after its premiere in Cannes.
Despite star Rami Malek receiving critical acclaim for his role as an amateur theater worker fighting AIDS (a Variety review called it his “best role since Bohemian Rhapsody”), there’s a lot of love for Tom Sturridge’s partner. While Malek takes center stage, Sturridge works deftly with the space around him, delivering a performance that is quiet and understated, yet deeply moving.
Sturridge last appeared on the Cannes red carpet in 2022’s Irma Veep and before that in 2012’s On the Road, but the experience of working with Sachs was unlike any other film he’s made. There were no rehearsals, no dialogue or scenes discussed before filming. As he points out, this was a “major leap of faith” by the director, but everything could be discovered on camera. “He allows things to sit and breathe,” he says. “And he believes you are enough. You don’t need to announce it. He’ll find out.”
Speaking to Variety the morning after the premiere, Sturridge discussed what Sachs made him watch to understand both the history of The Man, I Love’s era and the grammar of the film, and what he was made to watch in order to work closely with Rami Malek to find the physical language to express the quiet connection of the longtime couple. He also announced that he will be joining the cast of director Mia Hansen-Love’s next film, a biopic of 18th century British writer and philosopher Mary Wollstonecraft, starring Renate Rijnsve.
How did “The Man I Love” come about? Have you known Ira before?
I didn’t know Ira personally, but I was aware of his work and was a deep fan. I think the first movie I saw of his was “Forty Shades of Blue,” but when this script came along, “The Passage” obviously came to mind. Because it had just been released. But I met him on Zoom and we talked for a few hours. I don’t even know if he talked about this project at all, but he’s a guy who just wants to gain people’s trust, and we exchanged stories about our lives. And after that he asked me to be a part of it.
How did he explain the role of Dennis to you?
To be honest, he wasn’t. Ira’s working style is a bit unique in my experience, as she doesn’t like to discuss films at all. He doesn’t like rehearsals. During camera tests and lighting settings before shooting, he would stop when I said a line. He is allergic to hearing the sound of the film before it rolls. Because he wants everything to be on camera.
Does that give you a little more freedom to experiment?
I don’t know if it gives you more freedom, but I think it gives you the trust that he has. Because it’s a huge leap of faith to have enough confidence that you’re going to get what you want, whatever it is, in a 48-minute shoot without any conversation or preparation about it beforehand. But by the same token, he gave us a huge amount of…research is such an ugly word…a huge amount of movies and literature and photos and videos to watch and absorb beforehand, so it’s not like we didn’t dig deep into it. He doesn’t like talking about literal scenes.
What movies did he give you?
He did two things. The first was to experience the history of that world. There were documentaries like David France’s How to Survive the Plague, and there was also a great film about the 80s club scene called Maestro. A book that was really important to me was Borrowed Time by Paul Monette. Then the other thing he did, again not to have a literal connection to the story, but to help me understand his film grammar, was to have him watch Chantal Akerman’s Je, Tu, Il, Elle, Cassavetes’ Opening Night, and Maurice Pialat’s Van Gogh. It was a university education.
And collaborated with Rami. You have a very sweet and subtle relationship, and you exist very beautifully even without saying much. How did you two prepare, especially without rehearsals?
Well, we knew each other beforehand through friends. And that basically meant we could meet. The moment we knew we were going to work on this, we met in a pub in London. We didn’t talk much about the film, but I think we tried to find a way to express something like the physical language of someone you’ve spent a lot of time with. As you say, there’s an intimacy and a quiet connection there. It’s difficult to let your imagination fly right away on set, so you need to understand how that intimacy will be expressed. There was no imaginary trick to it. It was just spending a lot of time together, not specifically discussing movies, just getting used to our physicality, learning how our bodies move, and understanding how to communicate in non-overt ways.
Reviews have praised your acting and the way Malik breathes with the space around his character. Do you enjoy playing a role where you don’t show much of yourself and only shine in quiet moments?
I think movies are unique in that they can express themselves because of the size of the screen. And that’s what you see on camera. I don’t think there is any other medium that allows us to observe how the human mind changes silently and instantaneously. But I also think it’s about Isla. We need filmmakers who are ready to look for that. He’s the type of person who takes long takes, doesn’t do a lot of interviews, and just lets things breathe. And he believes you are enough. No need to present. I’m sure he’ll find it.
Where did you shoot?
It was actually New York, which was crazy. Although very specific, I don’t think Ira is presenting this as a historical drama. But it was very important to him that the energy of the city was present right now, and we felt it every day.
Ira clearly wants to go back to a certain actor. Ben Whishaw has worked with him many times and now Rebecca Hall is also working with him. Are you part of the Sachs family now?
I can say that I want to be like that too.
What do you have?
Next up is Mia Hansen-Love.
Is it “If Love Should Die”, a movie about Mary Wollstonecraft and starring Renate Rijnsve?
Yeah! I vividly remember seeing Mia’s film Children of Children when I was about 23 years old and it was one of the most profound movie experiences I’ve ever had. I kind of shudder when I think about it. So I’ve wanted to work with her ever since, but it took me a while. I think she had to make the film in English.
So have you petitioned for this to come to you?
I’ve been working with her ex-husband Olivier (Assayas). I did two things with him, so I felt like I was on the periphery of her existence. And when I met her, I definitely petitioned.
