While being honored at the Los Angeles LGBT Center’s “A Place We Call Home” gala, Oscar winner Marcia Gay Harden offered passionate and sometimes hilarious advice to parents who don’t accept their queer children.
“We want things to change so that our basic human rights are protected, that we are safe, that our children are safe, that we have equal opportunities in the workplace, that we are not discriminated against, that we can get married, that we can adopt children, that we can serve in the military, that we serve in the church…I think it all starts at home,” Harden said. “The people I have to talk to tonight are old, stubborn, stubborn families.”
She continued, “Families who don’t accept the gay community, and it’s mothers I’m speaking to tonight because I believe that mothers are the true pioneers of change and leaders in their communities.”
All three of Harden’s children, Eulala, Hudson, and Julitta, identify as part of the LGBTQ community.
“If you don’t welcome the queer community into your life, either as friends or, if you’re lucky, as your children, you’re cutting off your nose to disfigure yourself,” Harden said. “You’re missing out on a great life experience and you’re basically making a huge mistake.”
Harden was presented with the Vanguard Award by his Code Black co-star Harry Ford.
“Tell your kids that you can’t be yourself and live in my house and be in my family, and that you’re missing out because you’re not coming home for Christmas,” Harden said.
And she said, “Honey, you haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen a lesbian stuffing a Thanksgiving turkey. No one picks out decorations for a Christmas party faster than a gay man…And if your ex shows up at the same Christmas party with his girlfriend or maybe his new wife, the gays will be the first to say you’re serving a woman.”
The gala, held Saturday night on the grounds of the Hollywood LGBT Center, raised $1.25 million.
“To these mothers, I say: join us, march with us, protect your children, help protect their rights, be an ally,” Harden said. “Your life will be very fulfilling and wonderful new doors and new experiences will open.
“So instead of telling young people across the country that there’s something wrong with them or that they don’t deserve dignity, let’s join us in pointing out that what others see as flaws and cracks are simply shining lights,” she added.
The evening’s program also included longtime community activist and center board member Luann Boylan receiving the Rand Schroeder Award from Billie Jean King and his wife Ilana Kloss.
Bianca Del Rio hosted the festival. Mayor Karen Bass presented the award to the center “in recognition of the great work that takes place here and the lives that are saved every day.”
Center CEO Joe Hollendner spoke out about political attacks on the queer community. “These attacks on our communities don’t just define the moment for the Center and our movement; they define the moment for each of us,” he said. “In my opinion, we have two paths forward: Either we choose to abandon our hard-won progress in the fight for liberation, joy, and community, or we choose courage.
“We choose integrity,” he continued. “We choose to do the right thing. The Los Angeles LGBT Center always chooses to lead with our values, and I know we can count on you to do the same.”
See more photos from the Los Angeles LGBT Center Gala below.
bianca del rio
Los Angeles LGB Getty Images
Billie Jean King, Luann Boylan, Ilana Cross
Los Angeles LGBT Center CEO Hollendner and Mayor Karen Bass
Harry Ford and Marcia Gay Harden
Los Angeles LGB Getty Images
