Ali Wong’s daughters are the inspiration for the 2019 New York Times bestselling book Dear Girls: Intimate Tales, Untold Secrets & Advice for Living Your Best Life.
The comedian and ex-husband Justin Hakuta were married for nearly 10 years before separating in April 2022, and their divorce was finalized in May 2024. The couple have two daughters, Mari (10 years old) and Nikki (7 years old).
In a 2024 interview with InStyle, Wong praised Hakuta’s ability to be a “non-traditional” mother and the support she received from her biological mother.
“It’s mainly because of her and my children’s father that I was able to do everything I needed to do,” she said.
Wong famously conceived a child in the 2016 and 2018 Netflix comedy specials Baby Cobra and Hard Knock Wife, which catapulted the comedian to stardom.
Following the success of her first comedy special, Wong was offered a book deal, but she had no idea to pursue the subject until she remembered the kind act of her late father, Adolphus Wong, who died of cancer in 2011. This letter inspired her to write this book in the form of a letter dedicated to her own daughter.
“I remember that before my father passed away, he wrote me this letter that started with ‘Dear Alexandra,’ and it reflected our relationship,” Wong told Ellen DeGeneres. “It was a very nice quote, but it was short and I wish he had written more. And after he died, it was too late to ask him all these questions about who he was before he became my father. He grew up really poor, so I only knew him as this successful anesthesiologist.”
she continued. “My daughters, you’ve only known me since I was in the womb filming a special, so you don’t know everything that I went through to get to this point, and I think that’s really important.”
In addition to her daughters being the inspiration for her book, motherhood has given Wong plenty of comedy material. Although she has been very candid about her parenting experiences over the years, she has never specifically joked about her daughter.
If you want to know more about Ali Wong’s two children, keep reading.
Mari Hakuda 10 years old
Wong’s first daughter, Mari, was born by caesarean section in November 2015. The comedian was pregnant with Mari in his first Netflix comedy special, Baby Cobra. In a May 2018 interview with The New York Times, the Always Be My Maybe star joked that she was worried that her then-husband wouldn’t love their children. Wong decided to give his daughter a Japanese name because his ex-girlfriend is half-Japanese and half-Filipino, and after Hakuta’s last name.
“There’s not much of me in her name,” she explained. “And I think subconsciously I did it to get him to love her.”
In her 2019 book, Wong opened up about her pregnancy with her first child and wrote about the health condition she was diagnosed with called intrauterine growth restriction (IUGR). She said she found out the news at 30 weeks pregnant and was informed by doctors that her baby was “not fully developed.”
“Apparently there was resistance to blood flow in the umbilical cord from the placenta to Mari,” she wrote. “It is dangerous to remain in the uterus past 37 weeks at the latest, and the obstetrician explained that better nutrition could be obtained outside the uterus than in the uterus.”
After Mari was born, Wong wrote in the book that she tried to become a stay-at-home mom for Mari, but that only lasted eight weeks. “Mari was a very kind and gentle person, but by the end of the day I was completely exhausted. The little things left me feeling pretty drained,” she wrote.
After the birth of their second daughter, Nikki, Wong talked about how Mari was adjusting to being an older sister on an April 2018 episode of The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Mari, whose little sister was born just three months ago, was “very jealous at first,” the Beef actress said.
“When the baby was born, my toddler wanted to be a baby again,” Wong explained. “Having a 2-year-old is really hard. I feel like I’m dating a mentally unstable woman who is also physically abusive and never has a problem with it. She kicked me in the neck today for restricting my intake of Thin Mints. So if you see a picture of us smiling, that’s a lie.”
Wong told DeGeneres that she was happy with her decision to have two children and would not have any more children, explaining, “I love being a mother and I love having two children. But I’ve had two C-sections and I’ve suffered enough.”
“This is my favorite mantra when it comes to motherhood: I’ve suffered enough,” she added. “When I feel mommy guilt, or pressure to be a better mom, or to cook my kids some quinoa and salmon, I just say to myself, ‘I’ve suffered enough,’ and then I think it’s okay to let them have a bag of chips for dinner.”
Wong later told DeGeneres that she didn’t want her daughters to become comedians for their safety, but in an October 2019 interview with TIME magazine, she talked about some of the funniest things Mari has done.
“It’s hard to explain how funny this is, but when my oldest daughter was about 18 months old, she farted and immediately looked at me and said ‘no,'” Wong said. “And it was serious. She didn’t laugh or anything. But her timing was so good. She caught it at the tail end of the fart, and there she was like, ‘No.’ ”
Hakuta Nikki 7 years old
Wong gave birth to her second daughter, Nikki, in December 2017. Wong was pregnant with Nikki during the second Netflix special, Hard Knock Wife. As the youngest of four children, she intentionally chose to keep her daughters close in age due to the “painful” age gap between them.
“They were all 10 to 15 years older than me and lived very different lives as a family of five before I was born,” she wrote in Dear Girls. “I have framed pictures of them all on skis. When I was born, my parents weren’t on the slopes. They were on Metamucil.”
Wong, a mother of two, takes her two daughters with her when she tours the country doing stand-up. In an interview with Vanity Fair in April 2019, it was reported that the comedian was accompanied by Mari, Nikki, Hakuta, and either a nanny or a relative during the Milk & Money tour. This way, in each city, families were able to enjoy the area, including taking part in various activities for children, such as trips to museums and science centres. Once the children were asleep, Wong took to the stage for the show.
Wong still takes her daughters on tour. In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter in March 2023, she explained: “It’s such a beautiful thing to take my kids out on the road. It’s the complete opposite of movies and TV where I’m out all day.”
“It’s a really fun family adventure. We basically perform at night and during the day we go on adventures to children’s museums and gardens and visit family friends,” she added. “It’s really amazing that they’ve seen so much about America.”
Although Wong often jokes about Hakuta during her stand-up routines, and was pregnant during her 2016 and 2018 Netflix specials, she intentionally doesn’t joke about her daughters on stage.
“I feel like I need their permission, but they are 5 and 7 years old. They don’t fully understand my job yet,” she told the outlet. “And when my kids were toddlers, there was so much to complain about, and it was so hard. But now it’s so trite, because I love them so much and I love spending time with them. Everything I complain about feels trite and unnatural.”
